Family Together
by Emma Jay Bentley
Summary: In order to help his son deal with his grief Don Flack Sr decides to venture down a path long since shut.
1. Chapter 1

Family together

This was an idea I had ages ago and decided to run with it.

Chapter 1

Don didn't want to see anyone, the blinds were drawn and his phone was off. The last thing he expected was for his father to kick down the apartment door and drag him out of bed, half dragging, half carrying him to the bathroom before setting him under the coldest shower he'd ever had.

"What the hell?" Don asked feeling fully awake for the first time since it all happened. Don Sr. just stood there for a moment before turning the shower off.

"This isn't you; this isn't what she would have wanted." Donald replied handing a towel to his son.

"She's gone Dad." Don said before starting to cry. Donald had been expecting this, he knew his son would be in a bad way but he needed to get back to normal, staying in the dark wasn't good for him. He'd gone there to take him where he belonged, with his family.

"I know son, but it will get better I promise."

"Get the report to me by close of play tomorrow, really good work today," Peggy said with a smile to the young man in front of her. He beamed at the compliment. "Now go home and forget about work." She ordered and he nodded before leaving. She watched the newest member of her team head out of the building with a smile on his face, it had been a tough couple of days but the hard work had paid off. She could already tell that he had a good future ahead of him; he just needed to learn how to switch off. That had been her problem at times, but now she had to switch off, the moment she left work she was off duty unless she was on call. Her children needed all of their mother's attention, and she made sure they got it. She was about to start on some paperwork when the phone rang.

"Carmichael." She answered sitting back in her chair, looking at the clock she guessed that it wasn't going to be good news. "Ok, I'll get a team out now." She sighed before putting the phone down. She looked at the photo on her desk before picking up the phone again.

The house was empty when Don and Donald arrived, Sam was at work and his mother had left a note saying she'd gone shopping for dinner. Don was glad as it meant he could settle in before getting bombarded with a bunch of questions, he was sure Sam would have a lot to say to him.

"Honey you look exhausted, I'm making your favourite for tea, Sammy will be home later too, she's doing really well in this new job. She's even looking at getting a new place which will be nice." Nancy Flack said walking into the house and spotting her husband and son stood in the hallway. She was carrying some shopping bags which she immediately handed over to her husband before leading her son into the living room and sitting him down.

"You look a mess." Sammy observed entering the living room and sitting down next to her brother 2 hours later. He'd barely spoken since his father brought him there; he'd picked at his dinner and then returned to the living room where he stared at whatever was on TV.

"Well Sam my life isn't exactly great at the moment." Don replied with a large sigh.

"Ok, so how do you change that fact?" She asked. "Obviously without a time machine." She added and causing a slight smile to form on his lips, however it left as soon as it appeared. He didn't respond; he just remained seated as he was and his attention went back to the TV. Sam shared a look with her mother and then left the room.

Peggy put the last of her stuff in the car, signed the document and handed it over to the man stood closest to her.

"I want the first batch on my desk by noon." She said brightly even though it was almost 6am, she still hadn't been home and she was desperate to go to bed. Looking at the time she knew that it wasn't going to happen, she'd get in as people were due to start getting up.

"Will you be in by then?" The man asked forgetting who she was for a moment.

"Unlike you I have a meeting with the unit head at 9am." She replied and he gave her an apologetic smile. "See you in a few hours." She added before starting the engine and driving off.

Don settled himself onto the bed that had been in his room which was decorated the same as it had been when he was a teenager. He tried to relax but he couldn't, he kept on playing things over and over in his mind. Every time he tried to close his eyes he couldn't help but see her, and miss her. He just wanted to curl up and cry until he couldn't cry anymore or until she came back. And the saddest fact of all was that the thing he wanted the most was never going to happen.


	2. Chapter 2

Family together

Chapter 2

She tried to open the door quietly but it didn't work. It was 6.30am and of course Lilly the dog was more than happy to see Peggy, seconds later a 7 year old came bounding into the hallway wearing bright pink pyjamas.

"Mummy!" Jools exclaimed holding out her arms to be picked up and she was. "Where've you been?" Jools asked planting a kiss on her mother's cheek.

"Julianne I said give me two minutes." A deep voice said walking down the stairs, the owner of the voice looked incredibly tired but smiled upon seeing his mother. "Hey mum, you look like crap." 17 year old Bryan said before explaining that Julianne had been up since 5 and had been insisting on phoning mummy to see where she was. Peggy hated putting on him with looking after the youngster but she was stuck and he was more than happy to help her out. 15 year old Cole was still sound asleep and wouldn't be up until his alarm went off leaving him barely any time to make the school bus.

"Thanks." She replied sarcastically, "And thanks sweetie, I really appreciate it. Tell you what, this weekend some me and you time if you want." She wanted to make it up to him.

"No, how about this weekend you sleep and we go to grandmas." Bryan said and she nodded. He smiled and took his sister from her arms before going into the kitchen. Peggy followed to start getting on with breakfast.

A restless sleep left him wide awake and wandering the streets of the city he called home. Even at 4am there were still things going off, noises to be heard even though it was quieter than at other times. The familiar sound of a siren in the distance made him think of work and then of her causing a tear to fall down his face, he didn't stop he just kept on walking, he walked past the precinct, resisting the urge to go in. He walked past her apartment forcing himself not to press the buzzer, past his apartment, finally stopping in the park and sitting down on a bench. It was a bench they'd sat on countless times and had a chat, or simply sat together.

"I don't know what I'm going to do without you." He said picturing her there beside him. "It's not fair. I miss you." He sobbed placing his head in his hands. He eventually stopped and concentrated on his breathing before getting up and walking back to his parent's place.

He stopped outside and looked up at the place he'd grown up in, the 3 bedroom townhouse that his parents had scrimped and saved to buy when they first got married. The house was loved, was lived in and was safe. That's why his father had brought him back there, that's why his walk had ended with him returning there. He needed to be safe and loved.

"Cole!" Peggy shouted from the bottom of the stairs. "I'm leaving now if you want a lift!" It was 8am; she'd showered, changed and given both Jools and Bryan their breakfast as well as making 3 packed lunches, feeding the dog and taking her round the block.

"Hang on!" He shouted running down the stairs holding his shoes and socks, his shirt was undone and his tie was in his pocket. "Jesus you look rough. Hangover?" He asked reaching his mother and giving her a peck on the cheek.

"Just get in the car." She replied grabbing his schoolbag and lunch as she followed him out of the door.

"You shouldn't work so hard, it doesn't do you any favours." Cole commented climbing in the back next to his sister. Bryan turned around and shot him a glare which stopped him from saying anything else and he remained silent for the rest of the drive.

"Are you going home to sleep now?" Cole asked getting out of the car outside school. Peggy shook her head in response and told him that she had a meeting. "Well drive safely, love you mum." He said with a smile before shutting the car door and hurrying into school.

"I was thinking we could go fishing like we used too." Donald said as Don walked into the kitchen following his walk, Don Sr already had fishing rods out and was checking his tackle box. Don thought about the last time he'd gone fishing with his father, it had been years ago, it was where they had a lot of their man to man chats away from the females of the house. It was where Don had seen his father cry for the first time ever.

"Ok." Don replied sitting down at the table, the smile on his father's face filled him with a happiness that he hadn't felt in days, the look on his mother's face made him smile too.

"You bring any stinky fish into my kitchen you'll be cleaning it." Nancy warned but she was smiling brightly. She was glad that Don was willing to go out, and she knew that her husband would make sure the young man made it through ok.


	3. Chapter 3

Family together

Chapter 3

"Looking at you I'd say you haven't slept. And knowing you I'd say you got in and went straight into mommy mode, and have come straight from the school run." Brendan Williams said as Peggy took a seat in his office. She looked tired but didn't show it in her movements, or when she checked on the results which she'd sent to the lab 3 hours earlier. "Tough break catching that one, and you could have handed it over to anyone else. But we both know you and what you're like. It's your commitment that endears you to everyone you work with." He was being unusually sweet.

"Brendan just spit it out please, I am tired and I'm sure if you continue I will fall asleep." She replied, he was her boss but it was how they spoke to each other. On bad days the quips they passed between one another kept each of them going. His response was to pass her a piece of paper which she quickly read.

"As much as you love getting out and about I know that it gets harder and harder each time you miss going home or are in here super early. No guarantee of weekends off or any security in when you come and go." Brendan said moving away from his desk and coming to sit next to her. "It's not that I want rid of you because you know I don't. However you are long overdue for a promotion and this is one, a big one. You get regular hours – with the condition of 2 on call nights a month, time in here still on a consultancy basis. Which I insist is hands on. And you get to be home every night with the kids, maybe even pick them up from school more than once a week." She was silent as she took it all in, he asked her if she had any questions and she didn't, in her hands were details of the job she'd been working towards for the last 3 years, the reason she hadn't swapped jobs before now. Not only were the details better, the salary was a lot higher. At the moment they were surviving, to be honest she really was missing Ted's income for the comfort it gave when paying bills and buying food, with the promotion they'd be comfortable again and that's what she wanted.

The sound of birds tweeting and the water rippling had an instant calming effect on both men. They cast their lines and sat there in the small boat that was currently in the middle of a big lake. They'd been there for a few hours, not a lot had been said but what had been said meant a lot to both men. They were enjoying each other's company when Don decided to ask his father a big question that had been weighing on his mind a long time.

"Dad do you have anything you really regret?" Don asked ensuring he looked his father in the eye as he asked the question. If Don Sr. was fazed by the question he didn't show it when he asked what was on his sons mind. "I regret not asking Jess out sooner, I mean I liked her for ages but it never seemed the right time. Looking now I feel like an idiot. We could have had so much more time together." Don replied and his father nodded knowing that he'd have to tell his son his own regrets, or rather his biggest one.

"I tried to be like my own old man and it wasn't a good idea, he was never around, never understood. I should have been around more, made more of an effort with you kids. I missed too much, one day you were babies the next adults. I should have been there to see it." Don Sr. admitted and his son nodded before saying that he was there when it mattered the most, Don really appreciated that his father was there for him at that moment in time.

She walked out of Brendan's office feeling like a weight had been lifted off of her shoulders, a weight that she didn't realise she had on her shoulders before she'd gone into the room. She walked into her own office and sat down in her chair with a contented sigh and a big smile on her face and then let out a cheer that caught the attention of a few people on the floor.

Not only was she getting better working conditions and a better salary she was also leaping to be her boss' boss. The scale of the promotion shocked her slightly, but as Brendan admitted himself, she should have gotten his job years ago; it was just her dedication to her family that had prevented it. His hours were better than hers at present but he took a lot more work home than her, she knew from his wife just how much time he spent working at home whereas she left work at work. No, she was more than happy with what she'd just been offered and couldn't wait to tell the kids. They'd be thrilled to have her home more, and she needed to spend a lot more time with them.

"Boss I've got the report you wanted." A voice from the door said shaking her from her thoughts.

"Oh great, come in." She said and he took a seat across from her, handing her the report that she quickly scanned. "After you left we picked up a new case, I want you to take over the running, preliminary results should be ready by noon. All the details are here." She said passing him a folder that had been on her desk. He seemed shocked at being given a responsibility; he'd only ever been second in charge before.

"Mind if I ask why Boss?" He asked.

"I think it's time you got to experience it all for yourself. And I'm taking myself out of the loop; I want you to report directly to Williams. You think you can handle that?" She asked knowing he'd jump at the chance, he nodded in reply. She told him to do his best as she was sure he'd be fine.

There was cheering and congratulations as Don Jr. reeled in a large trout; it was possibly one of the largest fish he'd ever caught. He felt a sense of pride as he grabbed hold of it and felt the weight in his arms. He felt like he'd actually achieved something and it made him happy.

"Good one son." Don Sr. said patting him on the shoulder, he was even more thrilled at the smile that had been formed on his son's face the moment he'd started reeling something in. He'd done what he'd set out to do, he'd managed to take his son's mind of his heartache and focus on something else. It didn't matter if it was for seconds, minutes or even hours he'd done it. Don had been able to smile and laugh and he was sure the young man had doubted he'd be able to do that again.

"Guess we're having this for Dinner." Don said before the fish wiggled and was dropped into the water by a shocked Don. At that both men started laughing; it was a good end to a lovely day.


	4. Chapter 4

Family together

Chapter 4

Having passed the case over Peggy was able to leave work early and drove to school so she could pick Jools up. Spotting her mother rather than her auntie at the gate waiting for her caused the child to break into a run and practically jump on her mother.

"Hey sweetie." Peggy said relishing the affection her daughter was currently giving her, picking Jools up was a far too rare occurrence. She'd almost always been there for Bryan when he was her age, and Cole too. "I was thinking we could go and play in the park before the boys get home what do you think?" Peggy asked putting her daughter down and taking hold of her hand and walking towards the car.

"Will you push me on the swings?" Jools asked and her mother nodded, the response was a large beam and then Jools dragging her mother to the car.

"Never saw you as a fisherman." Danny said as Don told him about his day with his father. Danny had to admit that Don looked better following a day away from it all; he needed to remember that there was life away from grieving.

"I think I needed today more than I ever realised, I wondered what was going off when Dad threw me into the shower but I really appreciate it." Don said and Danny nodded glad that his friend finally appeared to be getting himself back together; he knew it wouldn't happen straight away but it was happening. Danny also thought that if anyone could sort Don out it would be his father.

"Good because there's a little girl wanting to see her uncle and I promised I'd ask him to come visit her." Danny replied talking about his daughter. "So the wife and I were hoping you'd come round for lunch tomorrow." Danny thought it'd be good to keep Don occupied and lunch at his would certainly do that.

It was early the next morning when Don went downstairs, sat in the kitchen he found his father sat looking at a photograph. He looked like he hadn't slept all night. Don thought something was up but didn't say anything; instead he just sat down across from him at the table.

"You asked me my biggest regret but you already know it." Don Sr. sighed still holding onto the photograph. "I was a bad father, a poor husband and a total ass." Don knew better than to interject. "It's a wonder that you, Sammy and your mother still speak to me, I'm lucky she didn't leave me. I broke her heart but she forgave me, I don't know why but she did. And I know that she still beats herself up over it, thinks herself a poor mother for it." Donald admitted, that thought alone made him feel worse. He'd heard his wife crying several times with her own guilt and wanted to ease it, but he was far too stubborn for his own good.

"You know what though Dad, I can't make amends with mine. You could though, what's worse, a future of regret wondering what if, or making the most of what we have left?" With that comment Don got up and left his father alone with his thoughts.

Dancing in the kitchen as she cooked dinner was something that Peggy used to love doing, often she was far too tired to spend a lot of time on dinner, let alone have fun preparing it. That evening though she had the energy and the perfect assistant. Jools was dancing next to her in an apron and holding a wooden spoon, the little girl was having a lot of fun. Jools was thrilled that her mother had chosen to put her new Hannah Montana CD on. The pair were dancing when the boys walked in and burst out laughing at the sight.

"You forget your medication?" Cole asked his mother ducking when she threw a towel at him. Bryan just stood watching, his mother seemed a lot more relaxed than she'd done in recent memory and it was rubbing off on his baby sister. Deciding he wanted to be part of the fun he picked up Jools and started dancing with her, then he threw a look at Cole who then started dancing with his mother.

They'd just finished eating their dinner when the phone rang. Cole answered then passed the phone over to his mother.

"Hello?" She said and then she quickly sat down with a shocked look on her face. "I'm I'm fine, just a little shocked that's all." She replied to the person on the line. The kids watched curiously as their mother barely said anything to the other person. "Ok, you do that, bye." She finally said putting the phone back in its place and turning to her children who all looked worried.

"I'm fine, nothing to worry about, just an old friend." She replied before excusing herself and heading outside for some fresh air.

Don Sr. hung up the phone and looked at his left hand which was shaking slightly, he'd been incredibly nervous about making the call. The first voice on the phone had shocked him slightly but he'd been even more shocked at the lack of reaction the woman he'd spoke to gave him. She'd sounded nonchalant about it all and he'd been expecting..., he didn't know what he'd been expecting. But he was happy that he'd made a start, Don had come in and given him a questioning look, he responded with a nod. Don then looked at his mother and his father shook his head. Don then left the pair of them in the room and waited for what was going to happen next.

Don was sat on the stairs by the living room when Sammy walked into the house, she looked at him and he motioned her to be quiet. Like he had done when he was a kid he was trying to listen to what was being said between his parents. They'd been speaking in low voices; the TV had been turned off so he knew it was serious.

"Don you're not a kid anymore get up and stop listening to conversations." Sam whispered to her brother who shot her a look that said 'shut up'. Then there was movement in the room and the pair quickly scrambled upstairs to Don's bedroom where his sister demanded an explanation.

"We were talking about regrets." Don explained and she nodded.

"I've got far too many, and I suppose he has even more." She said with a sigh. Don agreed with her there, and he was sure his mother would too.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

To say the phone call had surprised her was an understatement, she'd played normal for the rest of the evening but once the kids had gone to bed she reached for a large glass of wine.

"Why now?" She asked herself taking a sip of the liquid, she didn't often drink at home but the situation called for it, and one glass wouldn't hurt her. She took another sip before heading up to her bedroom and pulling an old box from the back of her wardrobe. She seldom went into the box but always knew where it was and her thoughts often led her to it. It contained a lot of memories, some happy and some sad but all important to her. It showed where she'd come from and what she'd done. The two worlds that had been separate for the last 20 years were coming back together, and she wasn't sure how she'd cope with it.

"How did she sound?"

"Where does she live?"

"Is she married?"

"Does she have kids?"

"When are we going to see her?"

Don and Sam fired questions at their parents as they sat in the kitchen with their parents. Roll back 20 years and it was a familiar sight, the four of them in the kitchen round the table. Only 20 years ago Nancy had been a lot thinner, worn and tired, now she had a glow that she'd suddenly gained back. Don remembered the glow from a long time ago.

"Your mother's going to call her in the morning." Don Sr. said. "I didn't want to overwhelm her." He paused. "Your sister not your mother." He added.

"Why now?" Sam asked shocked, she was also slightly angry about the whole situation.

"Regrets." Don said looking at his sister. She shook her head and stood up before storming out of the room and out of the house, she needed to process the information she'd been given. Nancy too needed time and followed her daughter.

"I knew it wasn't going to be easy, I just hope they're all ok." Don Sr. said before standing up and starting to pace around the kitchen. "I can't change the past but I can help the future." With that he left his son in the kitchen alone with his thoughts.

She kept on looking at the phone waiting for it to ring; she was nervous and had drunk 6 cups of tea already. She looked at the clock on the wall and hoped the phone would ring soon. Jools would need picking up from soccer in an hour, and the boys wanted dropping off at the cinema. She was paying for them to go and see an action flick, and she was going shopping with Jools. The phone rang and she quickly went to answer it saying a quiet hello. That was all it took for Nancy to start crying down the other end of the phone.

"Oh my god mum." Peggy said before she started crying herself.

"Sweetie, my angel." Nancy cried, "I thought I'd never hear your voice again."

"Me too mum, me too. How are you?" She asked wiping her eyes on her sleeve before Nancy started telling her how she was and asking questions about her life.

"I've got three babies; well they're not babies anymore. There's Bryan who's 17, Cole he's 15, and a little girl, Julianne, she's 7." Nancy cried again hearing about the grandchildren she never met, and as she didn't hear about a husband she knew better than to ask. She wasn't as tactless as her husband was, nor did she want to put her daughter on edge. She was just happy to be speaking to her daughter again.

"You should come and meet them; I know they'd love to meet you. And I'd love to see you." Peggy offered and her mother jumped at the chance. They talked for a while and Nancy said she'd phone during the week to confirm travel plans; Peggy couldn't wait for the call.

"So explain it to me again and this time slowly." Danny said to Flack as he was filled in on the situation. Don explained that 20 years ago Margaret Flack had come home from college and announced that she was getting married – to a man 10 years her senior. Don Sr. had gone mental and disowned her promising to never speak to her again. He'd barred his wife and 2 remaining children from ever speaking to her and he'd also forbidden the mentioning of her name in his house ever again. From that day on it was like she'd never existed. He'd stuck to his word until a few days ago when he'd called her.

"What was so bad about the guy?" Danny asked and Don responded by saying that he was an Irish Protestant and the Flacks were strictly catholic. Danny didn't get it but he knew Don Sr. to be a tough man who people didn't cross. He figured that Peggy must have really loved a guy to leave her family for him. "So you run a check on him?" Danny asked already knowing the answer.

"There are several Carmichael's in Boston and I don't know his first name. And I searched for my sister and found out she works with the Fire Department."

"So you going to see her?" Danny asked. Don shook his head and found that it was only going to be his mother; Nancy needed to see Peggy more than anyone. Nancy hadn't stopped talking about his sister since she's spoken to her on the phone, trying to imagine what she looked like, what her kids were like, what her home was like. She was really excited about her upcoming trip and Don was excited for her. He imagined his sister to look like she had done when she'd left only a little older, but he remembered her smile and how safe she made you feel when she hugged you. He was desperate to see her, to see the person he'd looked up to as a young boy, the person who'd been a second mother to him.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Jools had been thrilled to learn about another grandmother who was coming to visit, Cole wasn't really bothered but knew it was important for his mother and Bryan was overjoyed to see his mother really looking forward to something. He'd heard bits and bobs about his mother's family over the years but never asked about them, he knew when to speak and when to listen. His father had told him he was a lot like his mother in that respect. There were many times when Peggy only spoke when she had too, and she was a very good listener.

The person Bryan wasn't looking forward to meeting was his grandfather, he got the feeling that he was the reason his mother had split from her family. Luckily for everyone the only person coming to visit was Nancy and he was looking forward to meeting her. He knew that his mother had found it tough becoming a parent and being unable to call on her own mother for advice and guidance, but Peggy was extremely tough, his dad often referred to her as a survivor, Bryan agreed.

She changed her outfit twice before finally setting off for the train station, she gave instructions for Bryan to make sure Jools and Cole stayed clean and dry.

Upon arrival at the station Peggy looked around and set eyes on her mother for the first time in over 20 years, Nancy started crying the moment she saw her daughter. She'd recognise her anywhere, she'd changed but her face was still as it was the last time she'd seen it.

Peggy went and gave her mother a hug; both women stood together crying for about five minutes before Peggy led them to the car.

"You look amazing; you're so beautiful." Nancy smiled as Peggy started the engine and drove off.

Don and his father sat wondering how the meeting was going, Nancy said she'd call but they weren't really expecting her to do so. Peggy and Nancy had a lot of catching up to do.

Don Sr. decided to try and explain why he sent Peggy away but he couldn't quite get to it.

"I always wanted what was best for her; I wanted the best for all of you. I thought her getting married would cost her; you see she was a natural mother, looking after you and Sam when your mother and me were at work. I knew she'd want kids straight away and miss out on a career, maybe even miss out on finishing college. She was meant to be a big star, shine brightly. I saw it all about to end and I got angry." Don Sr. admitted to his son who appeared to understand.

"She works for Boston Fire Department in the Investigation unit, graduated in the top 5% of her class from college, she's well decorated and just got a promotion." Don said. "I ran a check and made a few calls." He then looked at his father. "She was meant to shine and it looks like she has done."

Nancy smiled as Peggy pulled onto the driveway, the house looked nice from the outside and it was on a nice looking street. The kids obviously heard the car pull up because by the time Nancy had gotten out of it they were stood by the front door.

"Mum meet my angels, Bryan, Cole and Julianne." Peggy said with a smile. "Kids this is your grandma Nancy." Bryan took the lead and went to shake Nancy's hand, Julianne followed and lastly Cole shook her hand before Peggy showed them inside. Lilly bounced up to greet the newcomer and then was distracted by a ball being thrown in the direction of the back garden.

"This is a nice place." Nancy observed looking at the tasteful décor and photos of the family adorning the hallway walls.

"Thanks, when we bought it we were stretching ourselves a little but it paid off in the end. I fell in love with this place the first time Ted and I looked at it." Peggy replied mentioning her husband for the first time, then she gave her mother a tour of the house.

It was Cole who eventually spoke to his grandmother about his father. Peggy was sorting something out in the kitchen, Bryan and Jools had taken Lilly for a walk so Cole decided to save his mother a difficult job. He'd gone into the living room and spotted Nancy looking at a family photograph, the last one that had been taken of them together.

"He died about 10 months ago, heart attack. He was at work. I remember it was a normal day; mum had been called into work early so Dad got us ready for school and dropped everyone off. Reminded me to clean my room that evening before he drove off, he'd done it thousands of times before. I said bye and that was it." Cole said not taking his eyes off of the photograph his grandmother still held. "Mum was in bits but she kept on going, stayed strong for us. Bryan grew up really fast, he's been great. She talks about him but we know it's not easy for her, I remember her once describing him as her rock. I think he got it right though when he turned around and said it was all her."

"Thank you." Nancy said managing to fight away the tears. She always knew that her daughter was strong; it took a lot for her to walk out of the house with only a suitcase full of clothes and a few books. She wouldn't have been able to do it, standing up to Don Sr. got easier with time but as a young woman she was never able to do it, Peggy had never been afraid of her father and that's what made her stand out from everyone else who lived in the Flack household. Don Sr managed to terrify Don Jr and Sam as kids, he ruled with an iron fist but Peggy always marched to her own beat following the rules but in her own way, which was probably why she was his favourite despite everything.

The last picture of all 3 Flack children was a favourite of Don's. Christmas before Peggy had announced she was getting married. Don was stood in the middle of his two sisters, Sammy looked really sweet and innocent, Peggy was 20, Don was 12 and Sammy was 8. The age gaps seemed huge then, and Don wondered what his 40 year old sister was like. He remembered her to be caring, strong, always looking out for him and Sammy. He had no doubt that she'd be a good mother.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Don picked his mother up at the train station Sunday evening, his mother was beaming and he couldn't help but smile as he took her bags and walked with her to the car listening to her describing everything. She was full of stories about what she'd done and details about the house, the city, Peggy and the kids.

"She's done so well for herself." Nancy said before describing more about his sister's life. He was more than happy to listen to it, Nancy was so happy and when they got home she showed pictures that Peggy had given her. Don spent hours looking at his nephews and nieces and imagining what it would have been like having Peggy as their mother.

"Look at that." Don said showing one of the photos to Stella. It was Peggy and the kids with the dog, their latest family photo. Their smiles were tinged with a sadness that you could only see if you were looking for it and knew what they were missing.

"She looks good, and the kids are sweethearts." Stella replied, it was good to see Don so happy, he had something positive to focus on, getting to know his sister again. He'd told her several times that she reminded him of his older sister; Stella had assumed she was dead as he seldom mentioned her. From what she'd now been told about Peggy Stella was hoping to one day meet the woman, she sounded like a very strong person who was something of an inspiration.

"She's coming down this weekend; the kids are staying with her husband's parents. She's staying a hotel, mum wanted her to stay at the house but she needs space. The last thing we want is to upset her and have her go again." Don replied he was really excited about her coming to visit; there was so much he wanted to say to her, to ask her. She'd moved on after losing her husband, he was struggling to get on with life after Jess died.

She was sat in her office with Brendan filling him in on what had happened with her mother and her plans for the weekend. Not only was he her boss but he was also her best friend, the man who'd helped her clear out Ted's clothes because she couldn't do it on her own. The man who'd put her to bed the one and only time she got drunk to block out the pain of her husband dying. He knew all about how and why she'd lost contact with her family, and he was her head when her emotions started to get in her way.

"I still don't get how you can be so nice to them after what they put you through." Brendan sighed putting down his cup of coffee. "I know she was scared of your father but as a parent I don't understand how anyone can let their child go and have no contact with them for 20 years." He was married with an 8 year old daughter Heather who went to the same school as Jools.

"Nor do I, but I do know that you shouldn't live a life wondering what if. I don't regret walking out of the house that day, and I'd do it again, even knowing what's going to happen that I'd lose Ted. I know that if we don't make the effort now then that's it. I can move on, I have a brother and a sister who I've missed every day and a life I want to share with them. I hope you'll get that. As my best friend I need you to be there for me on this, no matter what." Peggy replied and Brendan nodded.

Nancy spent ages picking the right place to put the photo of Peggy and the kids; she wanted it to be in a really good place. Just putting the photo in the house made her feel good, they looked really happy. Sammy couldn't stop looking at it, she was really excited about seeing her sister, there was so much she wanted to tell her, so much she wanted to ask her, and most of all she just wanted to hug her, feel safe in her big sister's arms.

"The kids are lovely, it's been hard for them but they managed to get through. If I had been her I'd have given up, I've been too reliant on your father and him dying would have messed me up." Nancy said. She knew that she'd never be able to cope on their own without Don Sr there, not without Peggy at least, had Don gone with Peggy still around they'd have coped, she'd have kept them together, Sam knew that too.

"Too tough for her own good sometimes that girl." Sammy sighed with a smile remembering her sister badly breaking a leg when she was in her teens and not crying even though Don was screaming at the sight of all the blood. "But for what it's worth you'd have done fine on your own." They'd have found a way at least.

"Do you remember much about her?" Nancy asked her youngest child. Sammy smiled and told her mum how she remembered being sang to when she couldn't sleep, or how whenever she was home from college she always let her crawl into bed with her for a cuddle. Even though she was a lot older Peggy still had time for her, she'd never turn her away. Nancy then apologised for allowing her to grow up without being able to talk about her big sister, it would have been tough for an 8 year old to have her sister there one day and the next be told that she'd never come home again.

"I missed her a lot, I still do, I thought about her all the time but then as I got older I guess I got angry, she was an adult she could have contacted me. Now I know she couldn't, she was protecting me like she always did. I can go for ages without thinking about her and then all of a sudden she's in my head; I can't wait to see her."

Nervous was not the way to describe Peggy as she sat on the train, she was a whole host of feelings. She'd cried as she left the kids, she hadn't done that in ages. Ted's mother had simply given her a hug and some sandwiches for her to eat on the train, she knew how tough it was, Mary had become her surrogate mother and was now watching Peggy become the scared 20 year old she once was. In her hand she held a piece of paper with her parent's address on but it wasn't needed, she knew the address by heart, she knew how many steps it was from the subway station which was 3 streets away.

She closed her eyes and thought about the last time she'd gone home from Boston to her parent's house. That day, she'd been so excited, a few hours later she was a broken woman. Going from telling them about this amazing man to saying goodbye forever. She wasn't really looking forward to seeing her father, there was so much that was unresolved between them, he'd caused everyone so much pain she knew it would be tough to see him. But he wasn't the reason she was going, she was going for everyone else and for herself.

Don checked his watch, the train would be arriving soon, they'd offered to pick her up from the station but she said she'd go and unpack at the hotel first. Nancy was going to meet her there first and they were then going to a café for lunch. Then everyone was going out for dinner, Nancy had first decided to cook a meal at home but she didn't want to overwhelm her daughter, so instead she picked the place that was Peggy's favourite as a young girl.

"What time does she arrive?" Lindsey asked watching Don looking at his watch for the hundredth time that morning.

"Anytime now." He replied.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

She hadn't been to New York since she left, it felt strange taking in what were once familiar sights, Boston was busy but nowhere near as busy as Manhattan, and she lived in the heart of suburbia, the location of their house expertly chosen in line with school districts. She checked in at the hotel and changed her clothes making sure she was downstairs in time to meet her mother who again greeted her with a large warm hug.

"You look lovely honey, good journey?" Nancy asked before complimenting Peggy on her outfit, she was really trying to put her daughter at ease.

At the end of his shift Don was out of the building the fastest he'd ever left, he wanted to go home and change, he really wanted to give his sister a good impression of himself. He felt stupid for wanting to impress her but he couldn't help it, he'd always looked up to her as a kid and he wanted to show that he was doing ok despite everything that had happened, he didn't want to make her worried about him.

"Nice tie." Sammy smiled as he straightened it in the hall mirror; she'd changed her own outfit several times wanting to give the right impression. Their mother had simply laughed at them and their excitement, it reminded her of the first time Peggy had come home from college, both Don and Sam had wanted to look nice and show her what they'd been up to. Then they'd only had a few months to catch up on, now they had a lifetime.

"Does this look ok?" Don Sr. asked all of a sudden emerging from the bedroom, he'd not said anything about the visit since it had been announced and he'd barely said anything in the 24 hours before. Stood in the doorway he looked incredibly nervous and for a moment his two youngest children felt sorry for him, he was going to have to make the biggest effort with Peggy, he'd broken the family up.

"It's fine Dad." Don replied checking his tie again.

She was in the foyer waiting when they arrived, she kept out of sight for a moment to take a good look at them all, Sammy had been a little girl the last time she'd seen her and Don a teenager waiting for his voice to break. Don Sr. hadn't changed a bit, still stern looking but on this occasion he looked slightly nervous. Nancy however just looked happy and her face lit up as she saw her daughter walking towards them.

"Peggy!" Sammy exclaimed before running to her big sister and hugging her, squeezing her tightly as if to give her 20 years of hugs all at once, Peggy felt tears on her cheek and told her not to cry. Don was next up to give his big sister a hug.

"Told you I'd be bigger than you." He laughed and so did she, the last time she'd seen him she'd been about an inch taller than him, now she was about a foot shorter. Then they went silent as Don Sr. approached his daughter, she opened her arms and gave her father a hug that was slightly awkward before stepping back.

"We better get going the reservations for 7.30." Nancy announced to get them going and away from the tension filled silence between father and Daughter.

Don watched carefully how his elder sister handled herself, she was clearly nervous about seeing everyone but she didn't show it. She looked wonderful; she'd obviously aged but had aged well, a few grey hairs visible that served to make her look wise. He noticed that she still wore her wedding ring and was also wearing a necklace that had been given as a gift on her 18th birthday from her brother and sister; he didn't know if it was a gesture but he liked it. He and Sammy had dragged their mother all over to find the perfect gift; they'd saved their pocket money and had been given a donation from their mother to buy it. They'd even had it engraved, he remembered arguing with a very young Sammy over the message on the back, _To the biggest corner of our triangle, love D & S. _in it they'd put a picture of the three of them, he wondered if that was still in it.

They headed out of the hotel and started walking, straight away Sammy took hold of her sister's arm and started asking lots of questions, Don fell into step behind them so he could hear what was being said, his parents following close behind.

"I can't believe you have 3 kids, I always knew you'd have some. What are they like?" Sammy asked excitedly, she liked the idea of being an aunt.

"They're good kids, Jools reminds me of you at her age, 7 years old and not a care in the world. Cole is the typical teenage boy, but he's a good lad. Bryan's my star, he had to grow up quickly and become the man of the house, but he shines at it." Peggy replied opening her handbag and fishing out a few pictures of the kids, Don smiled as he was passed them to look at.

"They're beautiful." Don smiled at his older sister.

The meal was lovely, it felt so good for the 5 of them to be sat in a restaurant together eating and talking, questions were asked from both sides stories were being told and memories shared. The only person not to get engaged in the conversation was Don Sr. he was quite happy sitting back and watching everyone else interact, they were all happier than they'd been in years. Then there was Peggy, his little girl who was now a mother herself, to kids a little younger than she was the last time he'd laid eyes on her. When he first spotted her he felt so proud of how she'd turned out, then he felt guilty for causing her pain, he'd promised to protect her the first time he'd held her in his arms at the hospital the day she was born. He'd really let her down and he'd never be able to make it up to her. Talking about her life in Boston she was exactly how he hoped she'd turn out to be, strong, successful, happy, a devoted mother and loving wife. He was heartbroken for her to hear her husband had died, but he could tell that they'd been incredibly happy together, they was she spoke about him told him that.

"Ted hated the whole house hunting process, I don't know how many houses I had him look at but the second I saw it I wanted it. There was something about it that got into me and I'm still living there now." She said telling them about the house.

"It sounds lovely." Don Sr. said sincerely and his comments were rewarded with a smile from Peggy.

The next morning Don and Sammy met their sister for breakfast leaving their parents at home to talk.

"Out of them all she always needed us the least; we should have hung onto her more." Nancy said with a sigh, Don shook his head saying she always needed room to become who she was meant to be. She'd been happy and that's all they'd ever wanted for each of their children.

"What about now? We should have been there for her when she got married, when she became a mother, when she buried her husband." Nancy started to shout letting years of built up anger escape, she reminded him of everything they'd missed, everything he'd cost them and everything he'd made her feel. By the end of it they were both crying and Nancy felt relieved for finally being able to get it all off of her chest.


	9. Chapter 9

Family together

Chapter 9

"So fire investigator, you'd get on great with the guys at the crime lab." Don said as Peggy gave more details about her job to her two younger siblings, it was far more relaxed than the meal the previous night. Don and Peggy did most of the talking with Sammy listening to them like she used to.

"I'm sorry I wasn't around for you both like I should have been, you were always in my thoughts, especially when I had the kids. Watching them reminded me of how we used to be and I wanted to speak to you I just couldn't." Peggy admitted.

"The triangle's back together now." Don smiled before pointing at the locket round her neck. He admitted that he couldn't believe she still wore it. She took it off and showed him that the picture of the three of them was still in it, across from it now though there was a picture of her own 3 children.

"You both have to come see them; Jools is thrilled about having an auntie and uncle." Peggy replied. Then their food turned up and they ate in comfortable silence. After they'd eaten Sammy had to head off to work saying goodbye to her sister and promising to call soon, then Don and Peggy were left on their own.

He felt like a different person in his big sister's presence, he felt safe, happy and younger. He filled her in on a lot of things that he'd done, what he was proud of and what he wished to change.

"I regret not looking for you when I should have done, I wanted to so many times but part of me couldn't face doing it." Don admitted that he was worried about their father's reaction, and also making things difficult for their mother. She understood, she'd held off contacting them for the same reason.

"Let's forget about the past, look to the future." She replied and at that he sighed, he told her that his future had changed.

"How did you cope after Ted died? Because I'm struggling and you seem to be ok." Don asked his big sister.

"At first the pain was unbearable; everywhere I turned I was reminded that he wasn't there. Waking up, breakfast, the kids, the dog, driving around the area, in the supermarket. Some days the last thing I wanted to do was get out of bed and face people but I had too. Not only did I have to adjust to not having a husband I had to help my children get used to no longer having a father. It took ages for Jools to stop asking for Daddy to do something; Cole thinks about him a lot, he and Ted were very close. Bryan is just Bryan, he's a lot like me, plays his cards close so as to not worry anyone, but I can see through him though."

"How did you find the strength to get up in the morning?" Don asked. She stopped and put her hand on her shoulder.

"Love, even though he was gone his love was still there, and he loved me enough to want me to move on and have a life." She admitted that it had been really tough and it still hurt months on, but it got easier. "And I'm lucky because he's still there in each of the children, so I know he'll never be gone."

Lunch was nice, in the Flack family home. Peggy was nervous walking through the front door with her brother, she immediately remembered the last time she'd been in the house and the feeling it brought up wasn't good. Don led her into the kitchen saying that a lot of her stuff was still in the room she shared with Sam, Don Sr. had wanted to throw all her stuff out but this was one area where Nancy stood her ground and insisted things were kept.

"So many memories." Peggy sighed walking into the bedroom she hadn't been in for years.

"It took a lot to keep your half of the room as it was at certain stages of my life, but then at times it really helped having it like this. Reminding me of my big sister even at the darkest of points." Sam said entering the room and sitting on her own bed. Don stood at the door watching Peggy pick things up and look at them, each item brought back a whole host of memories she'd hidden. She eventually stopped at a teddy bear, picking it up she hugged it and slid to the floor. Tective had been her most treasured childhood toy, tective had been named after her father, she'd struggled with detective so tective stuck. Don watched as a tear fell down her cheek, he knew that she was remembering everything, including her leaving. Seconds later she stood up saying that she had to go.

"Peggy what's up?" Don asked.

"I need to go, it's too much and I can't." She said welling up again. "Not now. I need to go home." She hurried out of the room, Don and Sam looked at one another as they heard her say goodbye to their mother, moments later the door slammed shut.

Don was going to chase after her but Sam stopped him saying their older sister needed time, it had been too much too soon, they'd done what they'd been worried about and put too much pressure on her. They should call her later and ask how her journey home was, nothing more and nothing sooner.

Peggy spent most of her journey thinking about everything that had happened over the weekend, it was too much too soon. The flood of emotions that had overwhelmed her in the bedroom was almost unbearable and she'd ended up thinking of all the bad things that had ever happened to her. Returning to her mother in laws house she collapsed in Mary's arms sobbing and that's where Jools found her when she got back from the shop with her grandfather.

"Mummy what's up?" Jools asked going to give her mother a hug.

"Just been a funny weekend sweetie." Peggy replied pulling her daughter close and inhaling her scent.

"Well mine's been funny – Cole fell over and landed in a puddle in the park." The little girl said before starting laughing at the memory of her older brother falling over.

"Things will take time to heal." Mac said to Don as he filled him in on the weekend's events.

"I just felt so bad seeing her like that, so helpless." Don admitted, he hated seeing his sister so upset. "I just want to know she's ok, Sam called but got the machine, she left a message but we haven't heard anything."

"Don she's a single mother with 3 kids and a full time job so she's probably busy, don't read anything into it and she'll call you back in time. Don't worry." Mac said trying to keep the younger mans mind at rest. Later that evening he'd received a voicemail from Peggy saying she was fine but was busy at work, she'd call soon.


	10. Chapter 10

Family together

Chapter 10

"So…to finish I'd like to wish Peggy all the best in her new role as my boss, I've been unlucky enough to spend my entire career working at her side so far and it's been a pleasure. We've laughed, cried and shouted with one another but I won't change a second of it. To Peggy!" Brendan raised his glass two weeks later. It was her leaving toast in the office before starting her new job a month later. She'd decided to take the week off as it was the school holidays and take the kids to New York. She'd called her mother and siblings a few times and was starting to feel better about the whole situation, and the thought of starting a new job gave her a determination to start a lot of things over again, one of those things being the relationship with her family.

"So we're going to take in a Rangers game, do the touristy thing, it's all planned out." Don told Danny, he was very excited about meeting his nephews and niece, so was Sam, even his father seemed to be excited but also very nervous. Don would have put money on the older man being most nervous about meeting his eldest grandson who was apparently the most like his mother.

"And you've arranged a tour of the lab; we're all looking forward to meeting the girl who's kicked your ass millions of times." Danny laughed enjoying seeing Don smile fully.

"Wow!" Bryan exclaimed looking up at the skyline as their cab drove them to the hotel where they were staying. "I can't believe you grew up here." His mother had never taken them to New York and with her family history he'd never really wanted to go there but at that moment he wished he'd been before.

"It's busier than Boston, I'll admit I have missed it loads." She said as the cab finally stopped and they started to get out. Jools looked around wonderstruck at the whole place, she'd never seen so many different people in such a small area, or as much traffic, Cole wore a similar expression to that of his younger sister and Peggy smiled as Cole and Jools held hands and looked around.

Don and Nancy stood anxiously in the foyer as they waited for Peggy and the kids, Nancy smiled as she spotted the boys arrive first closely followed by their sister and mother.

"Hi Grandma." Bryan smiled giving Nancy a hug then stepping back to look at his uncle; he was a similar size to the older man and had his mother's warm expression.

"Donny meet Bryan, Jools and Cole." Peggy said to her children who looked at Don. Jools was the first person to properly greet him giving him a huge hug, there was something about Don that she liked, then Cole shook the man's hand followed by Bryan. Peggy watched the interaction between her first born and her brother closely, she was eager for the two of them to get on.

Don was slightly awestruck as he watched his sister with her children, she was a natural to the role of mother paying attention to all 3 children at once as well as having a conversation with her own mother. In a short space of time he'd already formed opinions of his niece and nephews, Julianne was a bundle of energy, very happy and a lot like Sam, Cole was Don assumed very much like his father, laid back, a thinker who wanted to do well by his family, then there was Bryan who was every inch like Peggy, he was quiet, caring, always looking out for the people around him. He was watching over his siblings like Peggy had always watched over he and Sam when they were younger.

"Daddy liked hockey, he used to take us to watch games." Jools announced after Don told them about his plans to take them to a Rangers game. She said it with a sad tone and straight away Peggy picked the girl up and gave her a hug.

"Yep he did," Peggy said smiling at her daughter.

"He used to take mum and Jools to games, it was their thing." Bryan said quietly to his uncle who nodded suddenly regretting deciding to go to a game. As if reading Don's mind Bryan spoke up saying that it was good that they were going to one after so long, they enjoyed the hockey more than Ted. He just liked watching his girls having a good time and shouting their heads off.

Bryan was right, the two Carmichael females adored the game, shouting more than the rest of the group combined, Nancy was a little out of her depth but she enjoyed watching her grandchildren having a good time, even though she didn't approve of a young girl watching so much aggression.

"I forgot how much I loved watching a hockey game. Thanks for this." Peggy said to Don as they made their way for something to eat.

"I'm glad you enjoyed it." Don replied with a smile.

Bryan followed his mother into the Flack home and looked around nervously; they were going to be meeting his grandfather. After 2 days in New York the 'big' introduction was going to be made.

"So this is where you grew up?" Cole asked looking at the décor that hadn't really changed ever.

"One of the places, to be honest most of my growing up took place with your father." Peggy admitted with a slight smile, she grew into the woman she was after being forced to make a life away from that house.

"Come in and sit down." Nancy said leading them into the living room after hugging everyone.

They entered the room and Don Sr. stood up and smiled at the sight of the 3 youngsters. All 3 children stood looking at the man who'd sent their mother away from her family. Cole was the first one to step forward and shake the man's hand, he knew that Bryan would never take the first step and he wouldn't expect Jools to do it.

Things were awkward at first whilst Nancy got drinks helped by Jools; Peggy remained with her father and sons.

"So Bryan you looking at colleges?" Don asked feeling he should be the one to instigate conversation.

"Yeah." Bryan replied.

"Where are you looking?" Don asked slightly amazed at how he looked so much like his mother.

"Boston mainly, I want to stay close to home and we've got a lot of good colleges there." Bryan replied sharing a smile with his mother, she'd gone to a good college.

"Indeed there are, mind if I ask what you want to study?" Don asked and Bryan fell into conversation about the courses he was thinking about, watching the pair interact Peggy let out a sigh of relief that they appeared to be getting on.

Don Jr. gave his youngest nephew a tour of the house while Bryan and Don Sr. chatted about school.

"So this was her room?" Cole was amazed at the decoration in Peggy's half of the room.

"Peg always had funny taste in decoration, I hope she's changed." Don replied earning a chuckle from his nephew. Don felt the need to look out for Cole a little more than Bryan, Bryan seemed more sure of who he was and his place, Cole was probably struggling seeing his brother step up and leave him behind. "You know I really missed having her around growing up, I was younger than you when she left I was suddenly the eldest sibling."

"It feels like that with me sometimes, Bry's filled Dad's shoes a bit especially with Jools, she needs it. But then I feel like." He couldn't find the words to say how he was feeling. Don asked if he'd spoken to his mother, Cole shook his head, Don said he should talk to her, she was good at listening to people and gave good advice.


	11. Chapter 11

Family together

Chapter 11

Dinner went well and Peggy surprised her siblings and children by offering to help her father wash up, it would be the first period of time they'd spent alone together and everyone else knew to stay out of the kitchen.

"I remember us doing this when your mother was working putting the others to bed." Don Sr. said as he dried the pots that Peggy had just washed. She remained silent for a few moments before starting to speak what she'd held inside for over 20 years.

"There are times when I really want to hate you for sending me away; I needed my family, my siblings, my parents. And you took it away from me without stopping to ask me why." Her tone was very quiet but Don Sr. was hanging onto every word she was saying because he knew it'd been building up for a long while. "But you didn't and it makes me angry to watch my children grow up not knowing their father who was a good man, who would never ever disown one of them for following their heart." Tears were threatening to fall but her resolve remained steady. "That's what I did Daddy, followed my heart, just like you told me." A tear fell down her cheek. "I remember you saying that no matter what you'd always love me as long as I did what my heart told me because my heart was so big it could never be wrong. Then when I did that you told me to leave." She wiped her eyes with her sleeve before continuing. "I've only ever experienced pain that bad twice, the day I left and the day my husband died. I really want to hate you for all that pain but I can't. I've tried and I can't because you're my dad, the man who taught me to follow my heart and my heart led me to a fantastic life." She stopped and looked at her father's expression; tears were falling down his own face.

"You were meant to go on to be someone great, to make a difference and I couldn't see you doing that by getting married." Don replied before commenting on how he never thought he could be so wrong. She made a difference, she was someone great, you only had to look at her children to realise that, he'd always regret his decision but he knew she would never regret hers because of how much she loved them. "Now I look at you, a strong woman, a successful woman and a loving mother, you shine so brightly that people can't help but smile when they see you. And I'm proud to be able to call you my daughter." He added meaning every single word.

"I've missed you Daddy." Peggy sobbed stepping forward towards her father who opened his arms to embrace her. Within seconds both were sobbing, sobbing for all the pain and missed memories, sobbing for what they knew they'd never be able to get back.

"I hope they're ok in there." Sam said looking up from the board game she was playing with her brother and the kids. Nancy was stood watching the kitchen door straining to hear what was going on.

"Mum's probably telling him off for not doing the pots properly; Bryan always misses bits when he washes up." Jools stated matter of factly drawing people's attention away from the kitchen.

"What?" Don Jr. asked surprised, Jools simply smiled and passed the dice to Cole who laughed at his sister's innocence.

Ten minutes later the kitchen door opened and Peggy headed upstairs as Don Sr. returned to the living room, you couldn't tell he'd been crying.

"So your mother and I have been talking and she's invited us to spend Christmas in Boston, if that's ok with you 3?" Don asked his grandchildren, Jools's face lit up at the thought of having them there as she thought about more presents.

Sam knocked on the bedroom door before going in and sitting next to her older sister. Since seeing her again Sam constantly saw her as the young woman she was when she walked out and a second later as the grown up mother she really was.

"You've done an incredible job with those three down there." Sam said placing an arm around her sister's shoulder, it amazed her a little to discover that she was a lot taller than her older sister. "They're a credit to you and Ted."

"I wish you could have met him, I always told him about you, when Jools was born he insisted on Samantha as a middle name that way I'd have part of you there." Peggy said leaning into her sister's embrace.

"So you're serious about Christmas?" Sam asked deciding to get the topic to something happier. Before she could reply Don Jr walked into the room wearing a big smile.

"So I'll be working every holiday next year but I'm free for Christmas in Boston if the offer's open to baby brothers." He smiled and Peggy nodded. "Good because I'm looking forward to catching up on all the presents you've failed to give me the last few years." At that all 3 laughed.


	12. Chapter 12

Family together

Chapter 12

Mac noticed that Don was finally getting back to normal; he was constantly joking with Danny and generally much happier.

"I can't believe you're missing Christmas with me and my girls." Danny said with a smile knowing full well where his friend was heading, he was very happy for him.

"Well my big sister will beat me up if I'm not there. And as scared as I am of Lindsey she's got nothing on Peggy." Don laughed earning a glare from Lindsey who'd overheard part of their conversation.

"So you all packed and ready?" Lindsey asked and Don nodded before wishing everyone a merry Christmas and heading home where is parents and younger sister were waiting.

Peggy was still at work when they arrived, Sam her brother and Father were amazed at the house and how festive it looked from the outside. Knocking on the door they heard a series of loud barks before Cole opened the door with one hand whilst holding Lilly still with the other.

"Oh my god aren't you gorgeous?" Sam exclaimed dropping down to fuss the dog completely ignoring her nephew who was greeted by his uncle and grandparents. Jools bounced into the room ready for bed but waiting up to say goodnight to her grandparents.

"Hi, mum's sorry but there was an emergency and she had to work late, she just called and said she won't be long." Bryan explained after hugging the guests the explaining where they'd be sleeping, Jools was moving into Peggy's room with her so Sam could stay in her room, Don Jr was staying in Cole's room, Nancy and Don were staying in Bryans room and the boys were bedding down in the study with their Xbox.

Don was looking round the house with Sam when Peggy arrived home about an hour after they'd arrived. As usual she was greeted first by Lilly, the two younger siblings laughed as they watched Peggy fuss the dog before going into the lounge where sons and parents were. After a quick hello to them she made her way upstairs giving a hello hug to her siblings before going into say goodnight to Jools who was still awake. Don and Sam listened to mother saying goodnight to daughter, singing a lullaby that she'd sang to them when they were younger.

"I can't believe you still use that song." Don exclaimed as the trio headed downstairs.

"The old ones are the best." Peggy smiled leading the way into the kitchen.

"You've a beautiful house sis." Sam smiled taking in every part of the large home. Peggy smiled a thank you before putting on a pot of tea.

Jools woke her mother up at 5am, it was Christmas Eve and the youngster was already excited about the thought of Santa Claus coming. Peggy yawned getting out of bed and thinking that this might be the last Christmas where there was a 'believer' in the house. Mother and daughter were making breakfast when Nancy came downstairs and smiled at the sight, the pair were really happy and in their own world. It made her miss doing the same thing with her daughter, just being together and knowing what the other one was up to.

"Grandma!" Jools exclaimed running and giving the older woman a hug.

"Morning honey, can I do anything to help?" Nancy asked only to be told that she was a guest and to sit down. Peggy wasn't surprised that her mother was already up; she'd always been an early riser, if only to make breakfast for the family. Half an hour later Don Sr came downstairs ready for a walk.

"Going for a paper." He said after greeting the ladies, Jools asked to go with him so he held on while the little girl got dressed. "She's an angel that one." Don observed as Jools shot upstairs.

"I know." Peggy smiled.

Grandfather and Granddaughter were gone for almost an hour and both came back smiling, Don had been on a tour of the neighbourhood with a 7 year old as his tour guide. He couldn't help but be impressed with the youngster, the more he saw of her the more he was reminded of Peggy at that age and was made to think about everything he'd missed out on. He watched how Jools ran up and hugged her mother the moment they arrived at the house and how excited the little girl was when told she could go watch TV for a bit. Don watched with interest as he saw Peggy as a mother, checking on her family, preparing breakfast, feeding the dog and when she got a spare moment making a quick call to the office to check on how the latest case was going. She was a remarkable woman and wanted to do everything in his power to help her.


	13. Chapter 13

Family together

Chapter 13

Don Jr got up and went downstairs, he chuckled catching sight of his father watching children's TV with Lauren, he could never remember his father doing that with him and his sisters. Don walked into the kitchen and was greeted by the smell of coffee and breakfast that his sister had prepared.

"Just about to wake you guys, help yourself." Peggy smiled before heading to get her sons up. Again Don was amazed at his sister, she was incredible and she'd done it all on her own. There were times when he thought he'd lost everything when Jess had died, but in that house there and then he realised that he was lucky in his grief. His only concern then had been him; he only had to think about himself and his own feelings. They hadn't been together that long either, no real history, no memories in everywhere he looked or in everything he did.

"It's the holidays why do we have to be up so early?" Cole yawned entering the kitchen still wearing his pyjamas.

"Christmas eve and there's a lot to do." Peggy replied following him into the kitchen. "And if you think this is early I'll let your sister share the room with you and your brother tonight." Peggy gave a threatening look to her son and he knew better than to argue back, Don knew that his big sister would actually do it.

"Ok, sorry mum." Cole said before helping himself to breakfast as his older brother entered the room dressed for the day.

Peggy hadn't been looking forward to Christmas, even with her parents coming to spend it with them. It was going to be their first Christmas without Ted; it had been hard putting up the decorations, watching Brendan and Bryan putting the outside lights up instead of Ted. She knew the kids were finding it hard which was why she was trying so hard, why she was keeping them busy, it also kept her busy. The plan for the day was final preparations for the meal on Christmas day, and she was planning on taking the kids to the cemetery to see their father, and of course there was the church service that everyone in the community went to. As she was finishing breakfast the house phone rang. As Cole was closest he answered and passed the phone to his mother saying it was Brendan.

"Look I know your parents are over and I know its Christmas eve." Brendan said sounding very apologetic. Peggy cast a look at her two sons who were busy filling their faces.

"Where and what?" Peggy said reaching for a notepad and pen from the kitchen junk drawer. She scribbled down the details and then threw an apologetic look at her two boys who knew what was coming next.

"They wouldn't have called unless you were really needed." Cole said.

"We'll be fine." Bryan added and she let out a sigh of relief, now all she needed to do was tell her parents.

Half an hour after Brendan had called Peggy was on her way over to the scene of a suspect arson attack that they were still trying to put out. Her family been disappointed but understanding, her brother and father's professions helping with the understanding. Jools was just happy that she was still able to play with her grandfather, whilst her mother and sister had agreed to take over the food preparations.

As she arrived at the scene she knew why she'd been called, it was something resembling a disaster movie, she was only grateful that it was the holidays and that nobody was in the building.

"You owe me big time." Peggy said to Brendan as she got out of her car and walked over to the incident control centre.

"I know and I'm sorry, do you really think this is where I want to be today?" He asked in response and was shot down when Peggy reminded him that he'd asked to be on call to avoid his in laws. He filled her in as she got suited up so they could go into the part of the building that they'd cleared as safe to go in. Once she had her breathing apparatus on they went in.

Don Jr watched as his father and niece walked around the supermarket holding hands, he was enjoying seeing the softer side to the old man. It was doing everyone a lot of good; Don was just sorry his sister had been called into work. He'd heard about the fire on the radio and guessed it must have been a bad one for her to get called in. He felt sorry for her but suspected a few hours away from the house and her thoughts would do her the world of good. The house was full of reminders of Ted and he knew that her first Christmas without him would be hard and that she'd be thinking of him lots.

"How about we get your mum something nice since she'll have been working hard all day." Don Sr. Suggested to the delight of Jools and the amazement of Don Jr. His father wasn't usually one for buying presents.

They arrived home to find the house busy and found Ted's parents there, the meeting was full of tension from both Don Sr and Ted's father however Jools managed to keep both of her grandfather's occupied. Peggy got home about 5 looking tired and in need of a shower, her mother caught sight of the soot around her daughters face first and gave her a concerned look, Don Sr gave her a worried look at the state of her but the kids were used to it, she gave them a kiss and said hello to her in laws before heading upstairs to get ready for church.


	14. Chapter 14

Family together

Chapter 14

_Edward 'Ted' Carmichael_

_Beloved husband, father, son and friend._

_Always loved, never forgotten._

The message was simple but suited the man Don had heard his sister and nephews talk about. He wished so much he'd met the man his sister had left her family for, the man who'd made his sister so happy. He wanted to say thanks to him. Don had watched his nephews and niece place cards on the headstone; he'd watched Ted's parents lay a wreath there for their only son, and then he'd watched his elder sister lay a single red rose for her husband.

The family had headed into church however his father had remained outside and had gone over to the headstone, Don decided to follow him.

"I just wanted to say thank you," Don Sr said to the grave. "For looking after her so well when I chose not to. For giving me 3 amazing grandchildren, and for not turning them against me."

The church was packed with many people from the community, including Brendan who was introduced to the family, there were prayers said for absent friends and many wonderful hymns sung. Throughout the ceremony Don Sr. watched his eldest child supporting her children through their first Christmas without their father and being around her family for the first time in many years and felt a strong sense of admiration towards her. The more time he spent with her as an adult the more he regretted his actions towards all 3 of his children when they were younger. He should have been there for them more, he should have listened, he should have let Peggy get married with the support of the family, that way he wouldn't have had to miss out on watching his grandchildren growing up or his daughter turn into the incredible woman she was.

As they left the church Don Sr offered his daughter his arm and she took it, he could tell his daughter was tired and they strolled along behind the small crowd that was making their way back to the Carmichael home.

"How are you doing?" Father asked daughter as they walked side by side, they were well back from the others.

"Getting by, I just want things to be right this Christmas for the kids. It's hard for them, Ted was such a huge character, and he loved Christmas. When I boxed up his things I found the Santa suit he'd bought for Bryan's first Christmas, he always put it on when we were putting presents out." Peggy replied sadly, "Last year he made sure Jools spotted him and she was so excited. He loved it, everything about the holidays; he was full of so much joy." Tears fell down her cheeks as she spoke and Don pulled his firstborn into a hug and held her as she cried, as a father he felt helpless, nature was to protect your child but there were some things you couldn't protect them from, no matter how much you wanted to.

They reached the house 5 minutes after the others, Nancy gave a concerned look as she spotted her daughter had been crying but Peggy hurried upstairs to wash her face and regain her composure. Peggy felt drained after crying and speaking to her father, but it had felt good to cry and feel secure and protected for the first time in ages. There was a knock on the bedroom door and Nancy came in.

"I'll be down in a minute I just." Peggy started to explain but her mother simply sat down next to her and gave her a hug.

"It doesn't matter, they understand." Nancy replied as her daughter broke down for the second time in the same evening, Peggy cried for a long time and got out all of the emotions she'd been bottling up. They'd been upstairs for almost an hour when Cole came to see what was up. He walked in and took one look at his mother immediately realising what was up. He nodded at his grandmother who left them on their own.

"Mum," Cole said going to sit down next to his mother. "Everything's fine, we're doing ok. We really are Mum."

"I just..." Peggy tried to speak but started crying again. Cole didn't say anything; he simply grabbed her by the hand and led her downstairs.

Don couldn't remember ever laughing so hard, they were playing charades. A few family friends had come back to the house and there was a nice atmosphere in the room, his father was proving to be very entertaining working with Jools and Brendan's daughter Heather, the two girls didn't have a clue as to the name of the film. Don also enjoyed chatting to his sister's good friend and colleague, Brendan had been there for his sister each step of the way and provided a good insight into how his sister had coped.

Don looked away from the entertainment and saw his big sister stood at the door with her youngest son, he could tell she'd been crying, he shot her a smile and motioned for her to join in but she didn't, Cole simply led her away and outside. Don then noticed Bryan look where they'd gone, he made a move as if to get up but Nancy stopped him.

Mother and Son sat on the bench in the back garden; they sat in silence for a bit until Cole finally spoke.

"No sadness in the living room mum, we all miss him but we're ok, it's ok to miss him. He would want us to be happy, and laugh. So come on let's go and show that lot how to play charades." Cole smiled standing up and dragging his mother into the house.


	15. Chapter 15

Family together

Chapter 15

4:47 Am. That was the time Jools started jumping on her mother to get up and see if Santa had been.

"Go back to sleep." Peggy moaned rubbing the dog's head as she tried to get her owners attention.

"No, mummy can we see if he's been?" Jools asked beginning to bounce on the bed making the dog even more excited.

"Sweetie it's not even 5." Peggy started sitting up in bed and looking at how her daughter looked, it was a look she'd remember forever how excited and happy she was, the magic of Christmas was still there, possibly for the last year ever in the Carmichael household. "Ok, we can go and check but no opening until everyone's up and be quiet." Peggy warned starting to get out of bed as the boys came bouncing into the room and jumped onto the bed.

"I have to say I think I've been very good this year because Santa's left a whole load of presents downstairs." Bryan smiled fussing Lilly who was now on the bed with the rest of the family.

"Can we go down now?" Jools asked not happy that her brothers were delaying them going downstairs.

"Just a sec shortie, we got one present that Santa asked us to deliver." Cole replied sharing a look with his sister who nodded in understanding, she smiled at him and her eldest brother.

"Here, from all of us, we wanted to give it to you just us." Bryan said as Cole passed their mother a bag she hadn't noticed them come in with.

It was a musical jewellery box, a hand crafted wooden one, she knew Cole had made it for school, there was a tiny doll in the middle that belonged to Jools twirling round on a yo-yo that had once been Bryan's favourite toy. The killers were the song it was playing, 'And the way you look tonight' and a photo of the family taken the week before Ted died. In the gift she had something of all of them, Cole made it, Jools put a doll in it, Bryan's Yo-Yo and the song her husband sang to her when she was pregnant and unable to sleep, the song they'd danced to at their wedding, the song they'd first danced to a lifetime ago. She couldn't put into words her thanks but they knew.

Don Jr watched as his nephews ran into their mother's room on Christmas morning, so happy and so full of life. He knew that this was their first Christmas alone and it was important for them to have some time together. He'd woken up missing Jess more than ever, he'd thought about how they could have spent Christmas, who they would have gone to visit and the presents he'd have bought her. But then seeing his nephews going to their mother made him realise he needed to move on, they were moving on but still remembering, he could do that, he had to do that.

Hearing movement from the bedroom Don ducked back into his room and listened to the sound of footsteps heading downstairs, he was startled by a knock on the door and his sister popping her head into the room.

"Santa's been you coming?" Peggy asked smiling and then running off down the stairs after the kids.

Jools sat at the bottom of the stairs watching her brothers run in and out of the living room, she wanted to go in and open presents but at the last minute her mother had wanted to get the camera so she was now searching for one. She heard a noise and looked up hopefully only to see her Auntie coming down the stairs having been woken up by her brother to open presents.

"You're up?" Peggy asked breezing in from the kitchen carrying a large crime scene camera.

"And miss the madness on Christmas morning never." Sam smiled with a yawn turning round as she heard her parents coming down stairs. "And if I'm up I thought it's only fair they're up too." Sam gave a cheeky grin that made Peggy burst out laughing, the last Christmas she'd spent with her family Sam had said the exact same thing after waking her sister up at 3am to see if Santa had been.

There was laughter coming from the living room as Don Jr entered just in time to see Bryan and Cole fighting over who would open a present with both their names on. Don watched as Peggy gave Jools a look and the little girl managed to sneak and pick up the present, and open it herself.

"Jools."

"Mum."

The boys said at once, Peggy responded by shrugging her shoulders at her sons and sipping her tea. It was turning into a lovely morning, the Christmas that she wanted them to have. The phone rang and she answered it.

"Good morning merry Christmas." She answered watching her sons torment the dog with her new squeaky toy.

"I just called ... well ... how?" the voice down the other end said.

"I'm fine Brendan, we're all fine." Peggy smiled.

Don Sr watched his daughter watching her family as she chatted to her friends on the phone; he then glanced over at where his son and youngest daughter were playing with his granddaughter. This was the best Christmas he'd been part of in over 20 years, beating the first time he'd ever dressed up as Santa for his baby girl. He remembered the smile on 3 year old Peggy's face as he picked her up and spun her round the room so she was giggling. Then he remembered the first Christmas without Peggy, it was hard. Nancy had spent most of the morning faking being happy for the sake of Don Jr and Sam and he'd escaped to the pub at the first opportunity. He thought he was doing the right thing and that his daughter would come back to her Daddy to make things right, sat there in her living room he's glad she didn't.

About to carve the turkey at the dinner table he looked around at his wife, 3 children and 3 grandchildren he said a silent prayer of thanks and asked for many more meals like that.


	16. Epilogue

Family together

Epilogue

Don shouted with joy as he sunk the basket, it was a cold Saturday morning in February and he was playing basketball with Danny, they hadn't played in a long time and suddenly realised how much he'd missed it. He was enjoying himself and getting his life back on track, as his father had said life was getting better.

"So you gonna come out with the gang Friday night, we've got a sitter for little Lucy?" Danny asked, he'd been trying to get his best friend to come out; basketball had been one step now he was hoping for the next one.

"Sure count me in." Don smiled throwing the ball to Danny who sunk it.

"And you're not gonna pull out last minute?" Danny asked as Don had done before. "Cos if you do Lindsey will kick your ass right into next month where Stella will be waiting to finish the job."

"Tell you what I'll even let you kick my ass if I pull out."

Don Sr watched his wife chatting on the phone again as he checked his emails.

_Granddad_

_I got a B on my maths test which Mummy was really pleased with and Bryan said he's going to take me out to the pictures to say well done, just me and him. And he decyded to go to New York for unisity. Which is good cos he can come see you more. So when we visit him we can see you. I can't wait to see you in the holidays._

_Love_

_Jools._

He smiled and quickly typed a response. Sam had managed to get him online and once his granddaughter found out she sent him daily emails, he loved reading them and replying, made him feel close to her. He looked back up and Nancy was still talking, once upon a time he would have had a fit at her spending over 30 minutes on the phone but now he wasn't bothered, he liked how much happier his wife was simply chatting away to his daughter, they now chatted several times a week and he and Nancy regularly went to see her and the kids. He felt that paying for a train ticket every few weeks was a small price to pay to make up for the damage he'd caused, plus he went up with her every so often, he liked to do odd jobs around Peggy's house to make himself feel useful. And he liked that she let him do them even though she was more than capable of doing her own DIY.

Lilly made a big fuss of Peggy as she got in from work, the house was quiet but a quick glance at the time told her she was seconds ahead of her kids. Sure enough she'd taken her coat off and Cole and Jools came plodding in shaking snow off of themselves and giggling.

"We rolled down the big hill." Jools announced proudly before giving her mother a hug. Peggy raised her eyebrows at Cole.

"We took care don't worry and the snow's so thick there was nothing to worry about." Cole replied shooting his mother a smile. He knew exactly what to say to keep himself out of trouble.

"How about we go back outside and make a snowman then?" Peggy asked reaching for her coat as her two youngest cheered and headed out into the back garden giving Peggy a second to grab her camera.

"So you're going out with the guys this weekend?" Peggy asked Don over the phone, she'd just emailed over a picture of the kids building the snowman.

"Yeah, it's like you said a step at a time and don't spend all your time moping." Don replied referring to some advice she'd given him on how to get over losing Jess.

"Nice to know you still listen to me." Peggy laughed.

"So what about you? How are you going to cope with Bryan moving away?" Don asked, he knew it was going to be tough having Bryan go off to university but he knew it was the right thing for the young man to do.

"He needs to get back to being a teenager, he stepped up to the man of the house role when Ted died but he needs to enjoy himself more. And you know he is doing, Cole is doing more now and I'm home so much more to be there. Besides Jools is going to be doing all these new classes that I won't have time to miss him and Cole is starting on an AP programme, only he's determined to stay local, Harvard memorabilia is currently adorning his bedroom walls." Peggy rambled and Don smiled he liked it when she did that. "But it's good, we're finally back on track. I'm even getting out more, the girls have got me doing some classes at the gym, I'm happier you know."

"So am I." Don replied. "Taking each day as it comes and appreciating what I've got. In a way Jess dying worked out quite well." Don said wondering if he'd used the right words. "It made a few people work out their priorities and try to put things right, I'll always miss her but I know she would want me to get on with my life, like you and the kids. Always remembered, always loved." He liked that phrase Peggy had used on him, made him want to look on the bright side and move on because he was allowed too.

"Exactly baby brother." Peggy smiled glad her brother was finally going to be alright.

"Right then are you going to explain to me why I'm now getting emails from the old man about 6 times a day? I believe your daughter is to blame." Don smiled settling in for a long chat on the phone allowing his eyes to momentarily focus on a picture of Jess by the TV before turning his attention back to his sister knowing he was ok.


End file.
